To Date or Not to Date…That is the Question

unequally yoked

I was listening to a very popular Christian morning radio show this morning and was taken aback by comments made in response to the topic for the day–Why do Christians date non-believers?  One caller said that it’s because they feel that the person will convert to Christianity.  Another caller said that they are being led by the flesh in their decision to date non-believers.  One other caller said that it’s because they don’t trust God and are unwilling to wait on God to send them their mate.  And yet another caller said that 95% of the married couples in the United States did not wait on God and are suffering the consequences.  While herassertion and statistics were totally unsupported, I understood her point.  I was cool with the  other responses too, but what really got under my skin was what the radio announcer said.  It went something like this…some people misinterpret the Bible.  (I’m assuming that she was referring to 2 Cor. 6:14, the scripture on being unequally yoked.)  We’re not talking about marriage here, we’re talking about dating.  Hold up, wait a minute.  Isn’t dating supposed to lead to marriage for the believer? Of course you will not marry everyone you date, but that should be your ultimate purpose.  She went on to say that the first thing that draws you to a person is the way they look, not whether or not they are saved.  It might not be the first thing you see and it may not be the first thing you ask, but it sure as heck better not be the last.  Within the first few hours of conversation you should find out that brother’ssalvation status.  In my opinion, his answer should determine if and how you spend your next date (probably at a church service where an invitation to salvation will be given or somewhere that you can lead him to Christ yourself).

She continued with this…it’s okay to go out with an unbeliever because you never know what the future will hold.  Then she used Dr. Fred Price as an example.  Apparently he wasn’t saved when he married his wife.  No disrespect, but if I’m not mistaken Dr. Price is a very, very, very mature man age-wise.  Things were a lot different back in his younger days.  There is too much going on and too much satan is doing to kill, steal, and destroy believers, which makes it an unwise thing to do.   She’s right that you never know though.  You never know if he will get saved or NOT.  You never know if he will resent or respect your faith.  You never know if he will treat you like you deserve to be treated because he can’t do it according to God’s instructions if he doesn’t believe them.  You never know if you will influence him or if he will influence you.  It sounds like too much is being left to chance to me.  One thing is for sure–one person will definitely influence the other.  If you are not a strong believer yourself walking fully in the Word, you may end up on his side of the fence when it’s all said and done.  And that ain’t nothin’ to play with.

Neither is satan.  The Bible says in 1 Cor. 15:33, “Do not be deceived:  evil communications corrupt good manners.”  The NIV breaks it down like this, “Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character.”  It is crucial for a believer to watch the company they keep.  Some people may think this is harsh or judgmental.  I just believe the Word of God is true.  I believe that it is relevant and applicable to our daily lives.  God did not say this to make Christians feel that they are better than unbelievers. He said it for our protection because he knows that interaction with those of unlike faith can contaminate ours and be detrimental to our spiritual development.  How can two walk together unless they agree? (Amos 3:3) If we don’t believe the same things how can we agree on anything?  If God uses your good looks to draw others to Him even though they got saved just to impress you, then glory to God!  He can take someone’s wrong intentions and turn it around for their good.  That doesn’t mean though that you should make it a habit to go on missionary dates.  It’s not your job to try and change other people.  That’s between them and God, and God’s not even forcing anyone to change because of free will.

I know it can be tempting to go along with what a celebrity promotes, but don’t believe everything you hear.  Rather, try everything by the Word of God.  If it doesn’t line up with what it teaches, trash it.  That’s what I did.

I’m just sayin’.

What are your thoughts?


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